Erotica Gone Wild – Emanuelle in America

This movie is only for the open minded. Expect nudity aplenty along with some explicit sex, bestiality, even simulated snuff film footage.

Movie Poster

I have probably watched, under duress I might add, about a dozen Emmanuelle/Emanuelle movies, out the approximately two dozen or so available movies, (talk about sequels) so for those of you not familiar, a little background is in order. After seeing so many of these movies, I have come to the conclusion that name Emmanuelle means beautiful nymph in French. It is obvious because, in each of these movies, the only common denominator is a gorgeous woman of the world, who sleeps around, a lot.

Ok, I was kidding. The movies have a couple other common denominators, lousy plots and plenty T & A, so it is obvious that these movies were made for one reason and one reason only (other than to make money), to turn people, including me, on, so if you’re looking for brainfood you have mistakenly pushed the eye candy button.

Now, I know you are all dying to know why I said Emmanuelle/Emanuelle. Can you guess? I’ll give you a hint. Franco/Italio. Get it? What have I got to do? Draw you a picture. The first Emmanuelle movies were made in France and it took two years to get over the Alps to Italy and when it did they said ‘mama mia buenvideo’ or something like, that and started making Emanuelle movies, which means in Italian – beautiful fallen angel. As you have now, probably figured out, Emanuelle in America is of the Italio, fallen angel persuasion.

Emanuelle in America

As I said, I have probably viewed a dozen or so of these movies but Emanuelle in America was truly a surprise for me. There were parts in this film that made even me, blush. I didn’t say I closed my eyes or turned my head. I blushed. In fact, I grabbed the remote and went over the parts that made me blush so I could blush a few more times.


If you are the kind of person who doesn’t like to read about SEX and are easily embarassed or offended and wish you hadn‘t started reading this crazy review about this crazy movie, I understand, I’m the same way, sort of, so go with my blessing. Just give me a Most Helpful before you do and I’ll say a prayer for you and review a Disney movie in the future.

Back to the diehards. Emanuelle in America is one kinky, MF (morbid flick) which is not surprising since it was directed by Joe D’Amato, who is notorious for sex and gore.


In this movie, Emanuelle (Laura Gemser), is a “fashion photographer” (of nude women), photo journalist, investigative reporter (both undercover and above cover) and any other thing you can think of. After a preliminary scene where Emanuelle goes down on some guy with a gun that wants to kill her, she goes off to join some millionaire’s zodiac conceived concubine (Emanuelle‘s a Virgo). After bedding his right hand man, an interlude with two other naked girls in the pool and a lesbian scene in a sauna we are treated to a scene where a naked lady masturbates a horse. No really, I’m not kidding. While this is going on, Emanuelle is ostensibly taking voyeuristic photos with a miniature camera, embedded in a bracelet.

After she makes her getaway from the millionaires California compound, Emanuelle hooks up with a Duke? From Venice (Italy) who invites her the annual wingding he and his wife throw. After a manage a trios with the Duke and Duchess we have the shindig, which turns into a big orgy and of course our heroine is walking around the naked bodies, again taking pictures with the little camera, this time mounted in a tasteless costume jewelry necklace with an extra long chain, which is so obvious she may as well blurt out, “Hey, You mind if I take some fu*king pictures”. Here we get our first glimpse of hardcore as a woman performs fellatio.

Next our liberated mostly undercover trollop is off to a Caribbean island she heard about at the orgy, where the services of well endowed men (studs) are available (for sale) to wealthy women. The movie continues with her viewing and photographing more graphic sex, with her poorly hidden camera and even an investigation into the source of some snuff film footage, of which I will not go into.

What’s good

~ As usual Laura Gemser was lovely, though when she was fully dressed, her clothes seemed overly large on her. She must be tiny.

~ I must admit that I was intrigued rather than turned, off by the hardcore scenes. I was caught totally off guard, having never seen them in previous Emmanuelle/Emanuelle movies.

~ There was lots of nudity but except for Emanuelle with her Barbie Doll figure and the anatomically pleasing Duchess, few were exceptionally attractive.

What‘s not

~ Although Miss Gemser is shown entering into numerous intimate scenes, they all cut away before anything beside preliminaries are shown, (exception, the lesbian scenes).

~ For a professional undercover investigative photographer, Emanuelle was certainly obvious with her supposedly surreptitious photography, nor was her camera well hidden.

~ I may be wrong but some of the explicit sexual scenes in the movie looked, to me, like they were borrowed from other films. Oh well, who cares?

~ The story was weak and the ending was terrible but I’d watch it again!

~ In the scene where the kid had a gun to Emanuelle’s head, she didn’t appear to be the least bit nervous, let alone scared. Well, it was a bit laughable.

~ In fact, I guess you would have to say that overall the acting was weak but then who watches these movies for the acting.

~ Some of the cinematography and editing seemed weak as well. That means it looked like your home movies. (The quality not the subject matter {I hope})

Laura Gemser


When it comes to this version of Emanuelle, all you have to remember is Laura Gemser. For one hundred minutes we see Laura Gemser traipsing around the world mostly in profile. Now Gemser is a Eurasian beauty, no doubt, but not in profile. She, like another beauty, Heather Locklear do not photograph that well in profile. They kind of look like somebody stole the tip of their nose.

I must admit to some ambivalence regarding this film. On the one hand the film was fascinating, wondering what new kinky perversion D’Amato was going to throw at you next, as he pushed the envelope of decency, by tackling subjects that were taboo in polite society. Overall I enjoyed the film despite numerous flaws, so I’m not sure how I should rate it. I guess I’ll play it safe and rate it in the middle, 3 stars.

PS. This film is not recommended for children under the age of thirty-five!

Author’s Note

I usually try to provide a list of the cast but other than Laura Gemser, I was unable to find any credits for the other participants. Perhaps the supporting cast thought their performances were so bad, they wished remain anonymous.

March 16, 2008. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . erotic, explicit, Humor, intercourse, naked, overated, sex scenes, sexy, Softcore, women. 1 comment.

Too Much Clout for Iowa (and New Hampshire)! Too much Power for Evengelicals!

Am I mad. You bet I am. Every four years, two people get nominated to run for President of our fair country–all fifty states. Do I have any say in who gets nominated? Hell No! Do you have any say in who gets nominated? Not unless you live in Iowa or New Hampshire or possibly South Carolina. That’s right. The caucuses and primaries in two, sometimes three, rarely four under populated, relatively insignificant states, for better or worse (usually worse) always choose our candidates for president. The other ninety-seven percent of the population can go to hell.

Now, if you happen to live in one of the three or four deciding states, please don’t take what I say personal, you lucky dogs. I personally think the time for a national primary has arrived, but assuming things aren’t going to change, you people have an obligation to choose the best candidate for the rest of the country and frankly you haven’t. In hindsight one could argue that in 2000 and 2004 you gave us the worst candidate and Iowa, in 2008 you may have done it again. Mike (Huckster) Huckabee?

Ahhh. The Evangelicals. I’m about to ruffle some feathers here. It never ceases to amaze me how selfish this group can be. To the detriment of everything else their main concern always seems to be social issues. They got their man in 2000/2004 and look what it got us, two wars (one unprovoked and unwarranted), two trillion in additional debt, three, soon to be four dollar a gallon gas, disdain around the world, tax relief for the rich and an epidemic of corporate greed and fraud to name a few.

To the Evangelicals, think about it. Do social issues have anything to do with prosecuting a war, dealing with national emergencies, dealing with our former friends and enemies overseas, dealing with the energy crisis, curbing our national debt, providing affordable health care, or dealing with terrorists?

Mike (Huckster) Huckabee? The only candidate that has stated he believes in creation. Forget billions of years of sedimentary and fossil evidence. Forget Neanderthals and Cro-Magnons. For this man, the earth and life upon it began seven thousand years ago. (sometime after the first pyramid was built.)

Yes, Mike Huckabee is likable and charismatic, but I think we’ve learned that charisma doesn’t run a smooth government. The man was an apprentice to Jerry Falwell. He was a preacher for chrissake. Evangelicals, if you want to be taken seriously, go do some good in the world and stop trying to shove your religion down my throat.

January 4, 2008. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , . candidate, ethics, Evangelicals, fairness, George W. Bush, lobbists, overated, Overzealous, politicians, politics, President, President Bush, primary, pro life, science, Terrorism. Leave a comment.

Fallen – Get a Life Reviewers

Okay, It’s time to get silly again. This a review, more like an essay actually, I wrote four years ago of the very popular album Fallen (remember it?) by Evanescence in response to a very silly write off titled I Got So Mad I Got My Dad To Write A Letter Write Off

Why would anyone write the 56th review of an album? Why even the tenth or fifth review of an album, especially one where the only really good song has been played on the radio continuously for three months? And why has Amy Lee on the cover of Fallen been staring at me from Epinions home page almost as long? Has everybody flipped out? What’s the fuss about? If you think 56 reviews is a lot has, as I write this 57th epinions review, not one hundred, not two hundred, not four hundred, not six hundred but SEVEN HUNDRED AND EIGHTY-EIGHT REVIEWS!!!! Just think if anyone is as gung ho as the idiot that wrote the 788th review they could spend a long weekend reading all 844 reviews, 845 if you count mine. Wouldn’t that be entertaining!!!!Think about all the man hours and emotion that went into all that work. If we could bottle all that energy we could be the most dynamic country in the world, but we’d need to bottle some common sense too!!!!!

I know why I’m writing the 57th review of Fallen. Someone has to look beyond the hype and look objectively at this album and what, I think, it represents. Ok, so let’s start with the album. I know, by now that some of you are really mad at me for bashing your current favorite album. I know you like it and that’s fine, 31 flavors and all that jazz, but hear me out. I bought Fallen too, so I guess you you could say I fell for Fallen also. That is til I got it home and played it a time or two. It was then that I realized that It didn’t hold a candle to music I already had. I was attracted to it because of it’s femme gothic-metal tendencies and I’ll grudgingly admit it is a good album but not great and certainly not deserving of all the acclaim it has received.

So tell us Red Rider, What do you have that’s so much better? I’m getting to that but first I want to tell a little story. Our esteemed colleague Vanwarp has a teenage daughter and son and they did a very interesting exercise, whereupon he and his children each burned a ten track CD rom of their chosen favorites for the other two family members to listen to and outlined the ten songs each that were chosen. I was surprised, no shocked, to see that all their tastes were somewhat compatible. Not so in my family. I too have a teenage son and daughter. My son thinks that anything that is played on the radio is craap, and my daughter thinks that if it hasn’t made the FM play lists it lacks credibility. That is the point I am trying to make. Most people in America think like my daughter. No radio, no credibility. I, on the other hand, have begun to think the opposite. Radio play is like a negative role model. Although a good song occasionally slips in on alternative or top 40 radio, I still think the best stuff isn’t being played but that may change thanks to the unabated popularity of Evanescence.

Hey man, what about the better stuff? I’m getting to that. Soon I promise. Ok now let’s talk about what Evanescence success represents. I am very happy that Fallen has been a blockbuster. I believe it provides a little crack in the wall of misconception surrounding the Femme Goth-metal sub genre. It provides some handholds for similarly inclined musicians to climb into the spotlight. The popularity of Fallen is going to create a demand for more Goth-metal music and where can it come from in the short term but the hot spot of the Goth-metal scene; Europe.

The better stuff man,
Ok, Waldo, now the good stuff. I can think of a dozen good Femme Fronted Gothic-Metal bands who, given the opportunity, could make great inroads here. I think Italian prog/gothic metal band Lacuna Coil has the best chance of making a breakthrough since they will be touring the country this summer and fall and their hit single “Heaven’s a Lie” is now getting air time on some radio stations. Another distinct possibility is Dutch Femme Fronted Goth-Metal band
Within Temptation, whose hit album Mother Earth has been having strong sales in the U.S. and whose phenomenal singer Sharon den Adel dwarfs Amy Lee.

In closing, to all those die hard fans of Evanescence, I have this to say; Don’t hate me I’m just expressing my opinion and GET A LIFE!!! There just might be something better around and oh yah, Norah Jones too while I’m at it!!!! I’d rather Be tongueing a Platypus!!!!!!

I will post links of the three Femme Gothic-Metal bands I’ve reviewed and a list of similar bands below.

Link for Polish Goth-Metal band Delight:

Link for Dutch Goth-Metal band Within Temptation:

Link for Italian Goth-Metal band Lacuna Coil:

I know it’s the usual procedure to write something about the music but since I wasn’t really writing about the music I have dispensed with this procedure. If this disappoints anyone, let me remind you. There are 56 other Epinions reviews available, which I’m sure actually cover the music.

Two week update It has been fourteen days since I posted this review and cooler heads seem to have prevailed at Epinions. There is only three new Evanescence reviews and they were all written by newbies. Amazon though is another matter. It seems the idiocy is running rampant. They are now up to 862 reviews an increase of 74 or 5.28 reviews per day.

One month update
It is now 34 days since this review was originally posted and Epinion reviews have picked up a bit with 7 new reviews in the twenty days since my last update, which brings the total to 66 and I see I received an off topic from one of the seven new review people. Probably felt silly after reading my review. Meanwhile Amazon is still chugging away with 927 reviews, opps, make that 928 reviews, err, I mean 929 reviews. Amazing, but they still have a long way to go to catch N Sync which has 1756, no it’s not a misprint, reviews.

Forty-seven day update
I don’t know when it happened but we’ve eclipsed the thousand mark. We are now at 1014 and counting.

I don’t know how many days update I know, it’s been a long time but I just had to do this update. Remember I joked about how Fallen had a long way to go to catch N’Sync with their 1756 reviews. Well as of 10/4/04 Fallen has 2138 reviews and counting! Think they could hit 5,000?

Just so you know now has 2.438 reviews on Fallen. I know because I just read every one of them!

September 5, 2007. CDs, fan, Goth, Iconic, Music, overated, Overzealous, review, reviews, rock concert. Leave a comment.